queerodactyl

Asexual Fanfiction

asexualfanfiction:

The majority of fanfictions seem to involve porn, so this blog is dedicated to asexual, graysexual, or demisexual interpretations of your favorite characters, as well as to worksafe fanfiction.

We’ll be collecting sex-free and asexual-inclusive fanfiction for any and every fandom under the sun in this one convenient blog. If you’re looking for fics from a certain fandom in particular, let us know and we’ll see what we can do to help.

Basically, we’re collecting any fics with lots of cuddling, make outs, and your favorite OTPs in a completely non-sexual setting. We will accept fanfiction with offscreen sex, but there will be nothing directly portrayed.

We want every fandom to participate if possible, so we will be tagging each post by fandom, ship, characters, genres, AUs, or any other necessary markers. Tags can be found in our directory.

Please feel free to make use of our ask and submit features to diversify our resources!

oliviasnitchbitch
Asexual education, awareness, and inclusion is not a cry for attention or to ruin safe spaces. It’s not just about wanting to feel special or wanting to make things difficult. It is about making sure people can grow up and be assured that they are not broken, that they are not alone, and that their existence is acknowledged.
drbrucebananer

Anonymous asked:

so its ace awareness week which is 200% necessary and delightful but ive seen a lot of people saying "ace people often will have sex and still fall in love and like none of us never have relationships" and as an aro ace person this makes me really uncomfortable? like on one hand i get that there are lots of misconceptions about aces but i was watching a video that said that the percentage of aces completely disinterested in sex was like 0 and it made me really anxious? am i the problem? thanks!

dyemelikeasunset answered:

I understand why it would make you uncomfortable; a lot of ace-politics spend so much time trying to debunk myths that they end up sweeping some identities under the rug.

This happened with the gay/lesbian community too, with people saying “not all gay men are girly” or “not all lesbians are bulldykes” etc. It’s to combat stereotypes, yeah, but in the end it shits on a lot of other identities that are only negative because of cishet culture.

While it’s completely true that asexuality is a huge umbrella (that ranges from those that have sex to those that don’t), social politics often try to “soften the blow” with attempts to “normalize” aces because we live in a “sex-is-normal” society. They succeed in one thing but completely ignore another.
Aces can have sex and some don’t want it whatsoever. By boxing everyone into “aces have sex and relationships too!!” it defeats the purpose of awareness by not being all-inclusive.
Ultimately, it’s a lack of intersectionality, and it’s pandering to sex-normal society. 

Please know that you aren’t the problem, it’s how other people are going about spreading “awareness.”

dyemelikeasunset:

ace-muslim:

I hope nobody minds if I add some general commentary to this. The point brought up by the anon OP and by dyemelikeasunset is very important.

Sex positivity can all too easily become sex normativity, which can be outright harmful for many asexuals, especially those of us who turned to the asexual community because we felt alienated by the sex normativity in mainstream culture. According to a community survey, 70% of those on the asexual spectrum have never had sex before (77% of asexuals, 61% of gray-As, and 59% of demisexuals) and an additional 11% have had sex before but are currently sexually inactive (9% of asexuals, 16% of gray-As, and 14% of demisexuals). Thus 81% of those on the asexual spectrum (86% of asexuals, 77% of gray-As, and 73% of demisexuals) are not sexually active. Yet, too often our outreach efforts say, “Some asexuals are sexually inactive, but others have sex,” as if these two were equivalent groups.

Moreover, the community survey also showed that 55% of those on the asexual spectrum are sex-averse or repulsed by the idea of having sex (65% of asexuals, 51% of gray-As, and 37% of demisexuals). Only 4% say they enjoy having sex (1% of asexuals, 4% of gray-As, and 11% of demisexuals). Again, saying “Some asexuals don’t like sex, and others do,” or talking a lot about, “being asexual doesn’t mean you can’t have and enjoy sex,” while true statements, may misrepresent the experiences of the majority of those on the asexual spectrum, especially of “core” asexuals (i.e., not gray-A or demisexual).

Other times, important concepts are presented in a very simplified form that ends up erasing the experiences and identities of many aces. For example, gray-asexuality is often presented as just experiencing sexual attraction rarely. In fact, there are many ways to be between.

Or take romantic orientation. This is often presented in a way that makes it seem like watered-down versions of sexual orientation categories. (This graphic, for example, just reproduces the Kinsey scale - right down to sticking aromantics off to the side as though we’re not related to all the other orientations. Kinsey’s study did the same thing to asexuals, calling us “Category X” and thus most people don’t realize that Kinsey knew about asexuality.)

This way of thinking about romantic orientation can result in dividing asexuals up and putting us with the related sexual orientations - something that erases asexuality. Moreover, heteroromantic asexuals are often treated as though they’re straight. They’re NOT. They’re asexual. People typically only identify as asexual after coming to realize that other identities don’t work for them, and that includes heterosexuality. Heteroromantic asexuals often face significant alienation in heterosexual relationships because of their asexuality, including coerced sex and rape (in fact, heteroromantic asexual women may be particularly at risk of domestic violence or sexual abuse, similar to bisexual women with male partners).

Another part of this is when non-asexuals decide that some asexuals get to be “queer” and others are excluded. Curiously, it’s not just heteroromantic asexuals who are excluded, but also aromantic asexuals. People who make these arguments often have a binary view of queerness, that is, that anyone who is not queer must therefore be straight. This leads to the nonsensical result that an aromantic asexual who is not attracted in any way to people of a different sex or gender, and who most likely has not had a relationship with them and does not want to, is called “straight” and told they don’t belong in LGBTQ spaces and need to go away. Isn’t it about time that we recognized that same-sex attraction is not the only way to be non-heteronormative?

But that’s not all! According to the same community survey quoted above, 29% of aces do not fit into the “Kinsey scale” type model of romantic orientation. That’s the largest single category in the survey! Some aces have developed the concept of wtfromantic to convey that this model leaves them out. Stop and think about this next time you say something like, “All aces have a romantic orientation, and the romantic orientations are just like the sexual orientations.” Whichever group you belong to (biromantic, heteroromantic, etc) there are more wtfromantic aces than there are of your group, and nearly third of all aces overall are wtfromantic.

If the way we present asexuality and the asexual spectrum to others does not resemble what the community actually looks like, and erases the experiences of many aces, we are doing a grave disservice to our own community and we need to stop and think about why it’s more important to be “accepted” by the mainstream than to do what’s best for our fellow aces.

I really need people to see this again

thatsoul-foryou-isinme

strawberreli:

ace-muslim:

new-ace-on-the-block:

Tiny Dinosaur wanted to help out with awareness so he made a tiny presentation.
Suggestions for improvements are very welcome, he has never made a presentation about asexuality before and he wants to make sure he gets it right.

This is so cute! <3

he’s wearing an ace ring around his neck, much cute

fuckyeahaces

Asexuality book—gathering test audience

swankivy:

Hey guys.

I’ve written a book about asexuality and I’m looking to pursue traditional publication for it. (This means not publishing it myself, getting a publisher to buy it/market it, and using mainstream channels to get it into the bookstores.) I think having a mainstream nonfiction book about asexuality in the lifestyles section for people to find when they search for it will help contribute to the message that asexuality is legitimate and real—both for asexual people themselves to find and for more traditional/more old-fashioned loved ones of asexual people (most notably but not limited to parents of asexual people).

I would like to have some test readers. Nonfiction books are often bought based on the premise/outline/proposal, after which the content is submitted and tweaked with input from the publisher, but I would like to have a solid working draft in case anyone wants to see it. I have already received interest from a publisher and an agent, but I think I need to pursue more options and I want to feel confident that the message is clear and that all audiences can understand it.

If you would like to be a test audience member, I will send you sections of the book chapter by chapter and you can keep offering feedback as long as you are interested (or until you read it all!). It’s relatively short (about 40,000 words) and I intend it to be a somewhat comprehensive *introduction*—not a huge amount of beyond 101 stuff, but at least enough to hint that it’s out there.

Potential test audience members can e-mail me at ivy@swankivy.com and I will discuss this with you privately, or send me an ask if you have a question. (Please don’t just reblog and volunteer in the comments—I’d like to negotiate and discuss privately off Tumblr if possible.) I will not be posting the content of the book anywhere on the Internet, but I will share updates on my progress.

I am looking for test audience members who are asexual AND audience members anywhere on the ace spectrum AND non-asexual people, because this IS for all audiences. I need comments on the content, comments on *missing* content (i.e., if I didn’t cover something and you think I should, tell me), and comments on the writing itself (I shouldn’t need much help with grammar/spelling/punctuation, though; I’m an editor).

Thanks in advance to those who volunteer. If you do not want to but know someone who might, feel free to tell them or spread this request around.

falsettofetish

Asexuals Exist or Something, Says Book, But They Are Probably Sad Like This Cookie

queenieofaces:

By SOMEONE WHO DOESN’T LIKE FACT-CHECKING

PUBLISHED: 17:43 EST, 8 September 2012


Caption: Asexuals enjoy baking, but they don’t believe in heart-shaped cookies, and thus smash them in hate-filled rage.


Roughly 1% of the world’s population is ‘asexual,’ according to experts.  This means that 70 million people feel no sexual attraction to other human beings, which basically means they hate everybody.


“I don’t hate everybody,” says some asexual somewhere (age 23).  ”I actually like a lot of people.  I’m just not sexually attracted to them.”  


As the above quote demonstrates, asexuals suffer from a dearth of human emotions.  Asexuals don’t feel the need to form bonds with other people, and enjoy living alone in cardboard boxes in the woods.  A large percentage of them (74.3%, according to a study conducted in the UK) enjoy playing sad songs on slightly out-of-tune ukuleles.


“Asexuality is caused by alien waves from space,” says Anthony Bogaert, who is in Canada and also a professor.  At least, he probably said something like that; the Daily Mail included that quote and we couldn’t be bothered to fact-check.


Experts say that ‘asexuals’ are only now ‘coming out’ so they can recruit young, untainted minds to their cause.  Their ultimate goal is to give everyone diabetes from non-heart-shaped cookies, so that people stop having sex.


“There are a lot of misconceptions about asexuality in the media,” says illegally hot David Jay, the founder of AVEN, who is so attractive it makes us sad that he is asexual.  He said other stuff too, but we were too busy ogling him to pay attention.

ephemeralcat

Also, wow, people think that asexual people are not oppressed?

ephemeralcat:

lunasspecto:

cabell:

(As opposed to “no more oppressed, in different ways, than hypersexual people or people perceived to be hypersexual for whatever reason,” which I think is a fair argument.)

Let’s see: I TA’d a college-level Human Sexuality class in 2007 in which asexuality was not MENTIONED, let alone covered, a significant form of erasure mirroring numerous other erasures outside of academia.

…Which has been suggested as a major reason that bisexual people suffer higher degrees of depression and substance abuse than people who identify as gay or lesbian, in case you’re one of those people who think that erasure is not oppression.  Another potential cause is general exclusion from straight and gay communities, which, oh look.

alierakieron mentioned the threat of corrective rape.

For aromantic people (as well as single people generally, but affecting people who don’t ever even want to marry more broadly), the ways in which marriage is used to assign rights and privileges in the United States is unfair and oppressive.

Family and social pressure to “meet the right person.”

Douchebags like Dan Savage saying that they “inflict themselves” on others, mirroring the sentiments of close others with less of a soapbox but probably more of an immediate effect on their lives.

As previously mentioned, asexual people are likely to be identified by others as queer and treated accordingly (perhaps particularly in secondary school settings?), and it doesn’t actually matter to their tormentors if they are “queer likes the same sex” or “queer we assume they do.”  Sexuality and gender are entangled in our culture—I’m not a huge fan of Rich overall, but “compulsory heterosexuality” (or as Pascoe later described it in high school boys, “compulsive heterosexuality”) is a useful concept.  Failure to perform, as well as “deviant performance,” is punished.

These are a few things that occur to me off the top of my head, as someone who is not asexual.  So I’m sure there are plenty more.

Jesus wept.  Not that I’m surprised, as a bisexual woman, that there are a lot of people who identify as queer who are deeply invested in keeping a lot of other people out.  I’ve just been successfully avoiding them for awhile, I guess.

These days I don’t usually reblog things that discuss whether aspects of the collective experiences of asexual people can be called “oppression,” but this post does a good job of pointing out what problems many asexual people do have in common, and I felt like being contrary after I saw it being mocked with impunity. There are important things here whether or not they can be called oppression.

Ugh thank you it’s so nice to have an ally say these things for once. One item the OP didn’t mention is the fact that aces who are bi/pan/homoromantic (etc) are more often than not perceived as bisexual/pansexual/gay, etc. If a homophobe sees two guys holding hands, he’s not going to know or care if they’re asexual. I myself have been harassed in my workplace multiple times for being perceived as a girl who likes girls (I say ‘perceived’ because I’m genderqueer).

It’s not the same as specifically being harassed for being asexual but I am being harassed for my romantic identity, so pretending like asexuals cannot be oppressed at all ever for their identity is wrong. Yes it is a byproduct of homophobia/misogyny and not ace-specific oppression but it still happens to us.

ephemeralcat

I’m done with feminism.

ephemeralcat:

I just wanted to make it known, and I’ll tell you why.

I am a DFAB (designated female at birth) gray-asexual genderqueer person. On Tumblr and other blogs, I’d say most feminists support me and want me in the movement. But all I’ve gotten for two years is lip service and honestly I’m fed up.

I don’t deny that feminists are allies. I don’t deny that feminists are fighting the good fight and are doing important work. I’m not trying to tell anyone not to be a feminist since literally all of my friends are feminists, just explaining that for my own mental health I can’t stay in a movement that continually erases my existence.

Discussions of feminism usually leave me feeling angry, upset, and erased, and I’m just done with those feelings. I’ve long since stopped going to the feminism club and feminist events on my campus. Last year I participated in The Vagina Monologues; this year I won’t even be watching.

I don’t really want to rain on anyone’s parade, but when will we all stop worshipping the ground Eve Ensler walks on and acknowledge how cissexist and ciscentric the Monologues are? Think about it. Only people who identify as women can participate and are represented, except plenty of people have vaginas and aren’t women. And plenty of women don’t have vaginas so writing a Monologue only about trans* women who’ve had bottom surgery is kind of fucked up. If it were The Women Monologues I could understand (except the bottom surgery part), except that the Monologues don’t represent any women who are asexual or nonsexual either. You can have a sex positive show while still acknowledging that there are some women who don’t give two fucks about sex. Some people don’t care for their vaginas either which is okay, but I guess that defeats the point of The Vagina Monologues, which is why I just avoid the show in general now.

I digress, but at the same time, this is really the problem I have with feminism. A lot of what I wrote above can be applied to the movement at large. So let me just say something:

I am done with feminism because I am done with issues that affect me being labeled as ‘women’s issues’.

I am done with feminism because I am done with issues that affect me as an asexual or genderqueer person not being talked about.

I am done with people assuming that by identifying as genderqueer, I have some kind of immunity against rape culture, street harassment, negative body image, discrimination in the workplace, etc - for being perceived as female, NOT for being perceived as queer. 

I am done with people even telling me outright that I benefit from male privilege because I’m genderqueer, even though I pass as female 99% of the time.

I am done with feeling ashamed and confused by mixed messages from my mind telling me I should just get over my gender dysphoria and embrace my body like feminists want me to.

I am done with feeling like I can’t talk about my (a)sexuality in a feminist context because I’m not actually a woman, even though I identify with women and female bodies.

But I’m done with seeing pictures of vaginas telling me to embrace my sexuality. And I’m done with being told to have lots of sex. I’m done with SEX being the face of feminism. I’m done with never being represented, ever. I’m done with never seeing my issues on feminist blogs. I’m done with not feeling important.

Most of all, I am so, so, so done

with people calling my health

MY HEALTH

a women’s issue.

Not everyone with a vagina is a woman, and I am so tired of saying that because I really thought everyone knew that by now. And not everyone with a vagina needs to be sexually empowered, or even wants their vagina, so when you post a picture of a vagina labeled “PUSSY POWER” or whatever, remember you’re talking to trans* people too. And that for some asexual people, they could give less of a fuck what was in their own pants. And whenever you post about something you think is a “women’s issue,” stop and ask yourself if it really is. The fact is, it probably isn’t.

There is no “common denominator” for women. Get used to that fact. There will never be a single factor under which women can unite except for the fact that they are oppressed, but some have more privilege than others, and some people don’t identify as women but patriarchy doesn’t give a fuck and treats them the same as if they were women. There is no universal women experience.

At any rate *steps off soap box*. This wasn’t really supposed to be a huge rant but here it is anyway. The bottom line is I’m just really done with being angry over every feminist thing that pops up on my dash, and since I don’t have the energy for this anymore, I’m taking an indefinite break from feminism.

(And if anyone replies to this saying “but feminism is for everyone” I will assume you either haven’t read the post or just want an ally cookie and will not dignify you with a response.)

lilylunastardust

lilylunastardust:

Queer asexual woman who doesn’t enjoy the idea of masturbation (for herself, rest y’all have at it) and never has is judging you hardcore person who made this video. Hardcore.

Whatever, I’m effing boss.

fuck erasure of asexual people. ALSO I’m sure there are people without hands who masturbate. JUSTSAYIN

petitsirena
As it currently stands, many asexual people often describe the sex-positive movement as unsafe for them. This is a problem that needs to be addressed by the community. One strategy to help change this is to talk more about asexual people’s concerns, and more generally about things that affect low-sexual-desire people. Obviously, many people feel unwelcome in a movement that rarely addresses their issues and where the people often don’t even know basic information about asexuality like vocabulary, definitions or common issues. This would also serve to make a lot of the anti-asexual and sex-normative attitudes in the community visible. For example, when discussions of asexuality occur in public places, concern trolling about the health of asexual people often abounds — up to and including outright denial of asexuality — as does demonization of asexual people in romantic relationships. I imagine that individual sex-positive people who want to root these out just don’t know where to find them, whereas for an asexual person it can be like stumbling through a minefield.

An Asexual Map for Sex-Positive Feminism

This is a great post that includes some key a-sexual topics of interest, examples of posts from a-sexual allies, and a list of a-sexual blogs. 

(via becauseiamawoman)

lilylunastardust
lilylunastardust:

femmesandfamily:

thewonderfulbuttnugget:

unknowable-woman:

saltmarshhag:

freibiergesicht:

palilicium:

bananasforpotassium:

tresmaladroit:

Where’s the asexual literature?

shit homophobic asexuals say


ok so first of all the books there appear to be non-fiction, not literature.
secondly, there aren’t really any major books, fiction or non, dealing with asexuality using the word/modern identity “asexual” cuz YALL HAVEN’T WRITTEN THEM YET
IT IS NOT DISCRIMINATION WHEN THE BOOKS YOU WANT AREN’T THERE BECAUSE YOU HAVE FAILED TO MAKE THAT HAPPEN
(and it’s still not gonna be ‘discrimination’ if future asexual works aren’t included under the glbt section ok)

this is a pattern with tumblr SJWs in general but it’s actually the same shit MRAs do too: act like all of the resources for and the cultural footprints of an oppressed group fell out of the fucking sky or were rationed out by governments or something. it’s so incredibly disrespectful.

asexual literature
asexual literature
asexual literature
where can anyone possibly find books where people don’t have sex, I wonder

genfic

apparently about to disagree with everyone. whatever.
while I don’t think asexuality should necessarily be in the lgbt section, i think it would be great to have visibility asexual characters in literature.  characters that explore what it means to be asexual.  I see ABSOLUTELY NOTHING WRONG WITH WANTING THAT.
And saying “go write it” is such a derailing tactic.  fuck that noise.

wow that was really harsh people above femmesandfamily, the OP only said “where’s the asexual literature” and as femmesandfamily said, what is wrong with wanting some visible representation? And that doesn’t mean books without sex, so hold the sarcasm there please. Read a children’s novel for that. It means exploring someone who is asexual’s life (if they use that word). Like maybe a Y.A. book that has a teen struggling to understand themselves as ace in a world that shows desiring sex as mandatory to humanity (why are we always aliens? i mean i like aliens and robots but im very human thank you very much).Sure there is stuff that needs to be written and we are workin on thank you but that takes time of course. There probably is stuff out there that exists in a more subtle way just as there are things out there with homoerotic subtext. I will say, it is more difficult than you’d hope getting anything asexual visibility wise out there in the entertainment sphere because most people brush off asexuality as boring (im looking at you Moffat).I don’t think the OP was trying to say OMG DISCRIMINATION MINE IS WORSE THAN YOURS (which is what I am sensing was implied? let me know if I’m off on that), but more, hey I would like some visibility too please. And that is completely valid. I agree. I would like some visibility. I also don’t know where the homophobia was so if someone could enlighten me because I don’t want to take your feelings away from you.Now, also, I am completely aware that asexual issues are different than LGBT (but again all the letters in that acronym are different from each other as well). There are certain spaces we have privilege and it’s important to be aware of that. But I’m going to admit it’s like a punch in the stomach every time someone says I (as asexual) can’t be considered a part of said communities. Not every ace identifies as queer but some, myself included, do. Maybe you’re more okay with me being in “the club” because I’m queer romantic, but either way, I wish people didn’t have to police that. It’s like I’m not “queer” enough and I don’t even know what that means.Why can’t ace nonfiction or fiction (when more of it exists) be in the same section? Where else would it go?I am asking serious questions so people can respond. i.e. this is not just a rando post

lilylunastardust:

femmesandfamily:

thewonderfulbuttnugget:

unknowable-woman:

saltmarshhag:

freibiergesicht:

palilicium:

bananasforpotassium:

tresmaladroit:

Where’s the asexual literature?

shit homophobic asexuals say

ok so first of all the books there appear to be non-fiction, not literature.

secondly, there aren’t really any major books, fiction or non, dealing with asexuality using the word/modern identity “asexual” cuz YALL HAVEN’T WRITTEN THEM YET

IT IS NOT DISCRIMINATION WHEN THE BOOKS YOU WANT AREN’T THERE BECAUSE YOU HAVE FAILED TO MAKE THAT HAPPEN

(and it’s still not gonna be ‘discrimination’ if future asexual works aren’t included under the glbt section ok)

this is a pattern with tumblr SJWs in general but it’s actually the same shit MRAs do too: act like all of the resources for and the cultural footprints of an oppressed group fell out of the fucking sky or were rationed out by governments or something. it’s so incredibly disrespectful.

asexual literature

asexual literature

asexual literature

where can anyone possibly find books where people don’t have sex, I wonder

genfic

apparently about to disagree with everyone. whatever.

while I don’t think asexuality should necessarily be in the lgbt section, i think it would be great to have visibility asexual characters in literature.  characters that explore what it means to be asexual.  I see ABSOLUTELY NOTHING WRONG WITH WANTING THAT.

And saying “go write it” is such a derailing tactic.  fuck that noise.

wow that was really harsh people above femmesandfamily, the OP only said “where’s the asexual literature” and as femmesandfamily said, what is wrong with wanting some visible representation? And that doesn’t mean books without sex, so hold the sarcasm there please. Read a children’s novel for that. It means exploring someone who is asexual’s life (if they use that word). Like maybe a Y.A. book that has a teen struggling to understand themselves as ace in a world that shows desiring sex as mandatory to humanity (why are we always aliens? i mean i like aliens and robots but im very human thank you very much).

Sure there is stuff that needs to be written and we are workin on thank you but that takes time of course. There probably is stuff out there that exists in a more subtle way just as there are things out there with homoerotic subtext. I will say, it is more difficult than you’d hope getting anything asexual visibility wise out there in the entertainment sphere because most people brush off asexuality as boring (im looking at you Moffat).

I don’t think the OP was trying to say OMG DISCRIMINATION MINE IS WORSE THAN YOURS (which is what I am sensing was implied? let me know if I’m off on that), but more, hey I would like some visibility too please. And that is completely valid. I agree. I would like some visibility. I also don’t know where the homophobia was so if someone could enlighten me because I don’t want to take your feelings away from you.

Now, also, I am completely aware that asexual issues are different than LGBT (but again all the letters in that acronym are different from each other as well). There are certain spaces we have privilege and it’s important to be aware of that. But I’m going to admit it’s like a punch in the stomach every time someone says I (as asexual) can’t be considered a part of said communities. Not every ace identifies as queer but some, myself included, do. Maybe you’re more okay with me being in “the club” because I’m queer romantic, but either way, I wish people didn’t have to police that. It’s like I’m not “queer” enough and I don’t even know what that means.

Why can’t ace nonfiction or fiction (when more of it exists) be in the same section? Where else would it go?

I am asking serious questions so people can respond. i.e. this is not just a rando post